December 10, 2002
Please Note:
The original of this commentary incorrectly confuses the characters of Roseanne Roseannadanna with Emily Litella. It's all Moira's fault. She's doing penance by being reminded of this everywhere she goes. We invite you to heap it on as well, if you have a spare moment.
Did You Say: "Never Mind?"... Let's take five with Moira Gunn. This is "Five Minutes".
Remember the late Gilda Radner? And the character she played by the name of Emily Litella? Gilda (as Emily) would be a guest on the Weekend Update segment of Saturday Night Live!, and she'd rant on and on, spouting her complaints about some social ill. Eventually, Jane Curtain would have to forcefully interrupt her, and present some basic fact. Emily would quickly calm down, smile meekly, and say, "Never mind."
Part of why it was so funny, and so poignant, is that from time to time, it's happened to each of us. For one reason or another, we didn't get the facts straight. Perhaps someone told us something, and that person was misinformed. Or we reacted before we read the entirety of the newspaper article. Or we took umbrage with a statement we took completely out of context.
Our emotions ran high and fast, until someone - or something - sets us straight.
Well, the same thing can happen to us as a society.
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In any community, a single incident can set off an emotional chain reaction, where public outrage demands action ... now. And that's exactly what happened in Manhattan in 1989. A young professional woman was attacked, raped and savagely brutalized in Central Park while she was out on her nightly jog. Marauding through the park were some 30 youths, harassing bicyclists and passers-by, stealing their possessions, physically assaulting them, and challenging their personal safety.
But the rape and near-murder proved too outrageous. The public outcry was deafening.
A small gang of teenagers quickly confessed. With physical evidence placing the victim's hair on two members of the gang, five young men were eventually found guilty of the crime.
But that was 1989, and this is now. The technology of DNA has shown that the semen samples from the woman's person and clothes belong to a convicted rapist/murderer, who was operating in the neighborhood at the time. Other physical evidence match his crimes as well, and now he's even confessed.
But it did make me wonder: what exactly is the truth?
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The truth is: There was no gang rape. The kids were in a different area of the park. The timeline didn't work. Their dubious confessions all conflicted with each other, as well as with the physical evidence. Their defense attorneys were a study in paralysis. And those two victim hairs? The ones found on the teenagers? The latest technology of DNA testing rears it head again - they don't even belong to the victim.
Make no mistake - these youths - 14, 15, 16 years of age - were up to no good. Some nine people were accosted that night. But what these boys didn't do was the famous rape. In the end, they garnered sentences ranging from 7 to 13 years, lost their young manhood, and devastated their families.
It was barely noticed that some of these young men actually served extra time in prison, refusing to admit their part in the crime, a necessary requirement for early parole. It may be bittersweet, but it's sweet vindication nonetheless, now that the Manhattan district attorney's office is seeking to reverse their convictions.
It took 13 years and advanced technology to create a voice loud enough to get the attention of the societal equivalent of Emily Litella, forcing us to collectively say, "Never mind."
I'm Moira Gunn. This is Five Minutes.
